I never wanted to breed with anything more than I want to with a lopunny. That perfect, curvy body. Those round, fluffy breasts. The child bearing hips of a literal goddess. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with her, pass my genes through her, and have her birth a set of perfect 6 IV offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance to get her pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would Gamefreak create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
I did 15 minutes of butthole sunning yesterday and feel supercharged for my week. I didn’t even need coffee this morning, I woke up bright and early with the sunrise ready for my day. Don’t take my word for it, just try it yourself so you can receive and feel the benificial power of the sun through your anus.
Remember to start your week by charging you anus with the power of the sun. Your anus is considered the “Fourth Eye” and it’s directly connected to your “Third Eye” and pineal gland. Absorbing sunlight through your anus is a great way to recharge your whole system. For many people in the world their anus is the seat of their consciousness and their consciousness needs brightening, what better way to brighten your mood by getting light to the darkest area of your body; if more people received nourishing light particles through their anus I believe there would be far less assholes in the world. 😭
Seriously though, it’s important to love the skin you live in, love your body and love yourself wholeheartedly and unconditionally. Spend time in your natural state in nature feeling the sun on your skin.
befree #bodypositivity #loveyourskin #loveyourbody #buttholesunning #yoga #yogi #crazysexyyoga #happybabypose #nature #naturalstate #sundayfunday #sundayvibes #sunshine #nkdart #motivation #nkd
What are you laughing at? You know, Orbees, those little water beads that swell up when you get them wet. The torture involves putting a whole bunch of them into my bladder while they dry so they expand inside, growing too big to pass out. This leaves me with a permanent need to relieve myself and a requirement of frequent trips to the bathroom as I can only let out a small amount of urine at a time. That's my fetish and if you don't like it you can leave.
Octopuses do not have any bones with the exception of their beaks, so if you are responsible and depraved enough to be literally the life support of your 8 limbed friend, you can debeak it like how you'd declaw a cat and then push your member into it's
You can then let it subsist on your baby batter
The Octopus is smart. Very smart. It will learn that without it's beak, it cannot feed on anything else but your human seed that has to be milked from you.
Every morning, you will feel your clothes slide off and
a damp weight on your lower half.
The sensation creeps up your body until most of the jiggly mass has enveloped the entire length. It will start pumping as fast as it can for it is hungry.
The animal gyrates its empty stomach and the folds of its brain rubbing on your glans, begging for nutrition.
You climax and give the marine creature's breakfast. The pumping slows down but doesn't stop to milk out the last few drops of its meal.
Looking into its yellow animal eyes, it looks back with a thousand-yard stare. This will be routine for all of its meals for the rest of it's 3-5 years on this god forsaken planet.
Oh god I wish Polka would show up unannounced at my front porch in her clown car with inflatable condoms shaped like circus elephants. She would barge in through my front door but barley fit as her puffy clown dress leaves almost no room to spare. Polka would then pull me up to the bedroom, but I would be too embarrassed to look at her reaction as the room is entirely decorated in clown memorabilia. With a powerful shove, Polka would push me onto the bed sheets, releasing a honk sound from the bed's hidden integrated clown mechanism. I would then sit there and watch Polka painstakingly take of the layers of her clown outfit, as she struggles with the intricacy of the many floofs and puffs. When Polka finally strips to just her underwear, she would mount me and clap down with a powerful grip. Unable to break free of Polka's well trained circus hands, I would surrender my being to whatever she desires. As I'd be held down with a single hand, Polka slides her underwear to the side. Finally. Clussy.
imagine dozens of cockroaches crawling into your dickhole. the feeling of thousands of tiny legs marching across your penis flesh as they travel into your balls and bladder. it hurts, so, so much. you arch your back from the discomfort, but deep down you love it. you love the fact you are at the mercy of these bugs that don’t even know how much they are ruining you. you stifle a moan by biting your lower lip as your uretha stretches to it’s limit, ready to break open at any moment. you want it so bad; it’s already enough that they are beginning to explore your insides, and you can feel where every one of them is and what they are doing with insatiable pleasure. the vibration they give off from their crawling and wriggling is practically driving you mad with shameful lust, and you feel yourself reaching your climax. you are full on panting now, and you get the hardest you’ve ever been. eventually all the stimulation becomes too strong, and you cum bucketloads onto the ground, practically roaring from the sensation. the cockroaches were crushed from the sudden force, and one by one they come back out, guts, skin and all. by the time you are done, there is a puddle on the floor of white liquid and broken, mangled cockroach parts.
you are banned from that taco bell the very next day.
