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Cursed Thoughts

Cursed thoughts shared in discussions that is ridiculous and absurd in nature that it became a meme. Usually about popular characters and people.


Eu tenho sorte que eu não moro no mundo de pokemon.

    "I'm lucky that I don't live in the pokemon world" copypasta
    Eu tenho sorte que eu não moro no mundo de pokemon, se não eu já teria sido preso 134 vezes diferentes por zoofilia com todas as espécies existentes. Não sobraria um único monstro de bolso que não tivesse sentido o toque do meu pênis, e no final, eu me deixaria ser preso. diria à policial jenny: "Faça o que tiver que fazer, afinal, eu já ganhei", afinal de contas, já teria criado um híbrido com cada raça de pokemon existente nesse mundo. Eu seria mundialmente famoso em todas as regiões e cultuado por companheiros comedores de pokemon como um deus. Eu seria proibido de chegar dentro de 50m de uma gardevoir sem supervisão nos primeiros 3 dias de estadia no mundo pokemon. Em um mês, nenhuma eeveelution estaria segura, e em um ano, a data de minha execução seria marcada para preservar a pureza dos pokemons ainda não violados. Mas não seria o suficiente. com tamanha vontade de fazer sexo com pokemons, meu espírito certamente seria forte o suficiente para me transformar em um tipo fantasma, com uma anatomia ectoplásmica voltada completamente para o único e singelo propósito de espalhar meu DNA para a maior quantidade de pokemons possíveis.

    Open English version

    I'm lucky that I don't live in the pokemon world, otherwise I would have been arrested 134 different times for zoophilia with every existing species. There wouldn't be a single pocket monster left that hadn't felt the touch of my cock, and in the end, I'd let myself be trapped. he would say to police jenny: "Do what you have to do, after all, I already won", after all, he would have already created a hybrid with every existing pokemon race in this world. I would be world famous in all regions and worshiped by fellow pokemon eaters like a god. I would be banned from coming within 50m of an unsupervised gardevoir for the first 3 days of staying in pokemon world. In a month, no eeveelution would be safe, and in a year, my execution date would be set to preserve the purity of pokemons not yet violated. But it wouldn't be enough. with such a desire to have sex with pokemons, my spirit would certainly be strong enough to transform me into a ghost type, with an ectoplasmic anatomy completely focused on the sole and simple purpose of spreading my DNA to the greatest amount of pokemons possible.

    I take off all my clothes

      I take off all my clothes, furiously masturbate thinking about how much better I am for sleeping naked, swing my flaccid dick around four times counter clockwise, three times clockwise, then I assume a gymnasts starting pose and do a backflip into my bed, then I spend 20 minutes finding the perfect applause stock audio on YouTube so I can feel fulfilment for once in my life. Then I snuggle up under the covers, assume a fetal position, then I reach around and tickle my massive balls as I drift into sleep.

      Timeline: What If It Rained Semen

        Before 5 Years - Having Superpowers: You are the only person in the world with real superpowers
        
        Before 5 Years - Hidden Power: You are much more powerful than you think and you have hidden powers
        
        Before 30 minutes - Training Session: You are in a training session practicing with your powers
        
        Before 15 minutes - Trying to cause a rain: You try to cause a small rain to give water to the most needy
        
        Before 10 minutes - Something goes wrong: Your hidden powers reveal themselves and cause something to go wrong
        
        Starts at 0 seconds - Raining semen: Suddenly it starts to rain semen all over the world
        
        After 5 seconds - White Rain: We will begin to see drops of white color falling from the sky
        
        After 10 seconds - Viscous texture: Semen commonly has a slimy texture and so will the rain
        
        After 20 seconds - Birds falling: The weaker birds will not be able to fly due to the slimy texture that is falling on them
        
        After 35 seconds - Confused people: Once the semen reaches the ground, people will not know what it is
        
        After 50 seconds - Chlorine smell: Sperm has ammonia and other alkaloids that odor like some cleaning goods
        
        After 55 seconds - Very dirty people: Imagine having semen with a very slimy texture all over your body, that's disgusting!
        
        After 1 minute - People realizing: Seeing the texture of the rain, the color and the smell, many people will realize
        
        After 1 minute - Disgusted people: Everyone will be very disgusted and will seek refuge
        
        After 5 minutes - Dizzy people: The smell of the environment will make some people start to feel dizzy
        
        After 15 minutes - Increased temperatures: Semen is warm, which will increase the temperature of the environment
        
        After 30 minutes - All Fires Stop: Semen helps put out fires more than water
        
        After 1 hour - People vomiting: The smell of the environment will be so strong that many people will start vomiting
        
        After 2 hours - Semen floods: The semen texture will be more watery and cause flooding
        
        After 3 hours - Difficulty breathing: The smell will be so strong that many people will find it hard to breathe
        
        After 4 hours - Good for plants: Since most of the semen is water, it will be good for the plants
        
        After 5 hours - Drowning people: It will have rained for so many hours that the floods will have caused drowning
        
        After 5 hours - People Fainting: The weakest people will faint from the intense smell of the environment
        
        After 6 hours - Rain Stops: Finally after six long hours it will have stop raining
        
        After 6 hours - 1021 sperms released: For every milliliter of semen there are 50 million sperm, and billions of litres will have rained
        
        After 7 hours - Semen Rivers: Much of the semen will end up flowing into the rivers
        
        After 7 hours - Start cleaning: We will start cleaning the streets of all the semen that rained
        
        After 8 hours - People wearing masks: People will wear masks so as not to smell the unpleasant smell of the semen
        
        After 10 hours - Insects everywhere: Semen contains fructose and that will attract insects
        
        After 12 hours - Pregnant women: Many women who were drowning in semen and survived will get pregnant
        
        After 16 hours - Semen beaches: Semen of the rivers will reach the beaches and lakes
        
        After 1 day - Billions of fish die: Large of amounts of semen in the water will cause the fish to die
        
        After 3 days - Back to normal: Fortunately, semen will be easy to clean because it will turn to water over time
        
        After 10 days - Never using powers again: After what's happened, you'll never use your superpowers again
        
        After 50 years - Remembered forever: This rain will forever be remembered in the history books
        
        Semen is almost as safe as water and we shouldn't be disgusted.

        Is it racist if my dick only gets hard to white women?

          So recently I’ve been jerking off a lot, but I noticed a trend. I only masturbate to white women. At first I didn’t think too much of this, until my black best friend invited me to her house. One thing led to the next, and now she’s naked in front of me. I was trying to get hard before she pulled down my pants, but it was too late. She pulled down my pants to see a 2 cm flaccid penis, rather than my usual 10 inch hard cock. “Why is it that small?” She asked. I was speechless and nearly ran out of the room in embarrassment, until her white friend walked in the room. My penis grew and grew and grew when I saw her fully clothed white friend. “Oh my god, it’s so big” they said. So then we ended up having a threesome. The only problem was that each time I stuck my penis in my black friend, my penis became completely flaccid, while it got super super erect when I stuck it inside her white friend. Is my penis racist? Am I racist? I don’t know. I need answers

          Femboy Island

            I wanna be a billionaire so I can buy a private island, get ripped with a personal trainer until I can bend fucking steel beams, and capture the most attractive onlyfans femboys, pump them full of estrogen until they grow boobies, lose all body hair and most muscle mass, and they can barely maintain an erection, and set them free on my island. Then, I will hunt them by myself, naked, with a big ass knife and a tranquilizer gun and when I catch them one by one I rape their assholes until their butts look like an asteroid impact crater. Then, repeat the process until they develop such a severe case of Stockholm syndrome that they can’t move ten feet away from me without having a total mental breakdown and falling into a coma.

            Game Theory: How big is Freddy’s penis?

              Hey everyone, it's MatPat here with a brand new theory video.
              
              Today we're going to be trying to discover the penis size of Freddy Fazbear.
              
              Now, we don't have a lot to go on here. We know that Freddy is 6'11" tall, and we know that the average bear height is 1.8 – 2.4 meters.
              
              However, we can make an educated guess based on the average bear dick size, which is 7.3 inches (18.6 cm) long.
              
              Assuming that Freddy's penis is proportional to his height, we can estimate that his penis would be somewhere around 14.5 inches (36.8 cm) long.
              
              Of course, this is just an estimate, and we may never know the true answer. But it's still fun to speculate!
              
              But that's just a theory, a GAME theory
              
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