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Bastion is a way of life

    A few years ago in Overwatch, a player by the name SniperSmurf29 made this speech on a Lunar Colony game (“Bastion is a Way of Life” on YouTube) and ever since then, players have been using his speech at the beginning of their game specifically when they pick Bastion.

    It's nice to meet you, but it's even better to meet me. My name is SniperSmurf. I have 290 hours with Bastion in total and I specialize in sticking it straight up their fuckin culo. Bastion is a way of life for me. I go in there, I bend them over, I open their cheeks nice and wide, I get a nice, clear view of their colon, prostate, and the coccyx, and I knucklefuck them all the way up to the palm, right up the butt cut, so they feel a burning sensation deep in the ass-pussy like IcyHot. Bastion is a way of life for me, I never change my character, fuck you. If at any point during the match you want me to change characters, I will gladly suggest you go fuck yourself. I follow absolutely no type of team composition. If you wanna give orders, give them to eachother, don't you dare bring that shit to me. All I know how to do is go in there, get a lot of poopoo on my peeter, and a lot of shit on my dick from sticking it straight up their ass. Now let's go team.

    Full transcript

    Hello itstherubyness it's nice to meet you but it's even better to meet me. My name is SniperSmurf. I have 290 hours with Bastion in total and I specialize in stickin' it straight up their fuckin' culo. Bastion is a way of life for me. Go in there, I bend em over, I open their cheeks nice and wide, I get a nice clear view of the colon, prostate, and the coccyx, and I knucklefuck em all the way up to the palm right up the buttcunt, so they feel a burning sensation deep in the asspussy like ICYHOT. Bastion is a way of life for me, I never change my character fuck you. If at any point during the match you want me to change characters, I gladly suggest you go fuck yourself. I follow absolutely no type of team composition. If you wanna give orders, give them to eachother, don't you dare bring that shit to me. All I know how to do is go in there, get a lotta poopoo on my Peter, and a lot of shit on my dick from stickin' it straight up their ass. Now, let's go team.