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Response to “tickling my Willy”

    Who the fuck is "tickling their willy" anyway? You're telling me you got like a comical-ass feather duster grazing the tip of your bellend, laying in bed kicking ur feet around and giggling like a schoolgirl, and that brings you to orgasm?
    
    Ive got to obliterate my cock and balls when I jack off. There's enough lotion involved to turn the California Raisins back into grapes. I'm generating enough kinetic energy what with the violent back-n-forth of my left hand along the shaft of my dick to power a Ford F-150. The whole thing takes twenty minutes at least.
    
    My nerve endings are frayed beyond repair. Neurological surgeons and micro-electricians alike have wept bitter tears of defeat trying to piece together the sensory receptors around my scorched Earth of a penis. How the fuck are you tickling yourself in 2024 the year of our Lord?