Happy cake day uwu. *sticks tongue out cheekily* I bet you must be really cool if you've had a r-reddit account this long. *shy blush* oh u-um... *looks away* I think something else here is getting long too owo. *notices my bulge* omg im so sorry. *blushes more* it's just- I don't know what it is but knowing you've been such a good redditor for this long makes me feel weird things... *sweats a little* you know? *bites lips cutely* knowing that you can be dedicated to something for so long makes me feel like you could be loyal. *gulps with nervous giggle* um haha... *notices my bulge getting bigger* uh now that I think about it *tries to make normal conversation but fails* I could like your frosting haha! *red flushes as red as a fat juicy tomato* I... ha. You know I bet you're a really nice person you know? *shuffles trying to hide my now huge erection* I'd compliment you more my love *eyes widen* I mean friend, friend! omg I'm so sorry I really didn't mean to call you love *giggles shyly, shuffling more away from you* Anyway... I'd compliment you more my lo- friend! *looks directly down, desperate to avoid eye contact* but I have to go uh... *tries to make excuse* shopping! That's it, you see, I need some milk! So anyway I guess I'll talk to you later friend, happy cake day! *smiles sweetly and longingly at you*