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I can’t take it anymore. I’m sick of Lae’zel.

    Lae'zel from BG3 copypasta
    I try to replace her with Karlach. Lae'zel does more damage. I respec Shadowheart into Tempest Cleric. Lae'zel still does more damage. I try to swap in Gale; but Lae'zel does more damage. I want to test out Wyll. His best team has Lae'zel.
    
    I try to pass a dialogue check to save a frightened orphan from a fire. I fail. Lae'zel, with 8 charisma, uses Astral Knowledge and becomes profecient in Persuasion. She convinces the orphan that the fire builds character.
    
    I try to use Jump on Lae'zel. She grabs me by the throat. "I don't need your pitiful magic, Revrykal." She uses Enhanced Leap to reach and kill the three archers trying to ambush us with 6 of her 17 attacks that turn. She then uses Misty Step to teleport back and kill the barbarian charging us with another 2 strikes.
    
    We are surrounded by a group of angry frost elementals. I prepare a fireball. "Tsk'va", she says, "I don't need this spell." She removes Fireball from my spellbook and replaces it with Haste; I'm forced to use it on her. She nods to herself. "Better."
    
    Astarion is dying. I open up my alchemy satchel to try and craft a health potion but the only ingredients in my bag are for potions of speed. "You just need to funnel all your resources into giving me more attacks," Lae'zel says, "Vampires are already undying."
    
    We reach a bridge containing so many traps that the bridge itself has began to sink. Lae'zel fails to disarm the first trap. "Guess this is the end", she says, summoning her Mage Hand. She uses her Mage Hand to throw me into the middle of the bridge. As every trap begins to explode around me, there is no hint of sadness in her eyes. Nothing but pure, Githyanki pride. What a cruel world.

    The original pasta was “I’m so tired of Xiangling” from Genshin