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AITA the asshole for killing tens of millions of people because I wasn’t accepted into art school ?

    I (56M) am an Austrian living in Germany and always wanted to be an artist since I was a child, I lived in a poor household and frequently moved houses and so I didnt have many friend and so I took an interest in drawing, I used to draw all the time with passion, as soon as school finished I used to quickly go home and start drawing, and before I knew it it was night already, that's all I really did all day in my childhood and teens, putting my heart and soul into each and every art piece I've made, I was so proud and full of joy each time I complete a art work, it was the joy of my life, and I was sure that I was gonna continue to pursue this hobby all my life making it my career, so fast forward a couple of years, I dropped out of school at age 16, because I had other goals in life and went on to continue pursuing my art journey and applied at Germany's biggest art school, Academy of Fine Arts, I entered and left the exam room confident in my acceptance, I spent the rest of the day feeling immensely ecstatic, eagerly waiting for the letter to come in the mail, and soon enough hear it came, a gold coloured letter with fine writing, I though by the image of the letter it would say that I was accepted, but I was wrong, I was beyond shocked and surprised, the thought of it saying rejected hasent even crossed my mind since I applied, I was overly confident, I nearly fell unconscious, I felt sick, I felt betrayed, I felt depressed as all my life came crashing on me, that was the only thing I was good in, that was my life, and now it was all gone, I have no purpose in life, I started becoming an alcoholic to escape my depression and years later after forcibly fighting in a world war and seeing death all around me, It made me feel better, knowing that there were people who had it worst than me and that gave me the motivation to make myself a big figure and rise to highest ranks people to command people so I could fuel my happiness and to also take my revenge from the bastards who rejected me, am I the asshole?