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Squidward


Hey Squidward, shut the fuck up.

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    Hey Squidward, shut the fuck up. I don't know what your problem is, man. I have 30 minutes for lunch, and I'm spending them here, alright? There's no one behind me in line, so what if I took an extra ten seconds to order? Who cares, man? You really are something else, you know that? You lash out at people, and why? Because you hate your job? News flash, asshole, everyone hates their job. I work at the grocery store, I have to deal with bullshit all the time too. But I don't act like a sarcastic prick with customers. You know Squidward, this town does not like you, and it's not because you're some misunderstood artist, or genius, or we just don't 'get you', it's because you're mean, alright? Look at Spongebob, he works in front of a hot grill all day, but we like him, and you know why? Because he's nice. He says hello to us. Look man I don't want to be this type of customer you know, I don't like to start fights with folks, but like, you can't do that, alright? And I'm not gonna call out Mr Krabs or anything, I just want to get my food and go. Please learn from this. Alright?... Thank you...

    If you think about it, squidward would be a very efficient gay prostitute.

      Squidward couldve been a top 0.1% on onlyfans
      Where to fuckin begin? 8 arms. 8 dicks. Same time. Not persuaded? He also has a mouth. The guy can work 9 men at the same time. 8 20$ handjobs plus the one Guy getting a 50$ blowjob earns him 210$ in one session. But we’re not even done yet. 100$ to get butt fucked by a 10th guy, that’s 310$ in one session! Dick shaped nose goes up a guys ass, another 10$ there, actual dick goes up a guys ass, an easy 25$. And considering most men cum in under 5 minutes? He could have SO many of these orgies a day. He can basically earn as much as he wants to. Shit, he has countless suction cups on his tentacles. Put those babies on some nipples 5$ a minute? Man. Squidward my Guy, if you were smarter you could afford to move yourself way the fuck away from spongebob. Now that I think about it, you know how many holes spongebob has?? Need I say more?? Imagine squidward and spongebob teaming up, they could fuck SO. MANY. DUDES. I’m talking a million dollar gay prostitution EMPIRE. And with how absorbent spongebob is? Pshh. Talk about bukkake king. Use your fucking head squidward.

      Unimpressed Squidward

        ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡀⠠⠤⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⢤⡒⠉⠁⠀⠒⢂⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⣒⠤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣠⠾⠅⠈⠀⠙⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⢀⣀⣓⡀⠉⠀⠬⠕⢄⠀⠀ ⠀⣰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⠶⢦⡀⠑⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⠀ ⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢤⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⢀⣀⣀⠙⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡄ ⠀⢹⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠁⠀⠀⠙⡴⠁⠀⠀⠱⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀ ⠀⠀⠱⢄⡀⠀⢰⣁⣒⣒⣂⣰⣃⣀⣒⣒⣂⢣⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠲⢼⡀⠀⠙⠀⢠⡇⠀⠛⠀⠀⣌⣀⡤⠖⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡗⢄⣀⡠⠊⠈⢦⣀⣀⠔⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡇⠀⢰⠁⠀⠀⠀⢣⠀⠀⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠔⠊⠉⠁⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡆⠤⠿⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣧⠸⠒⣚⡩⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣏⣙⠒⢴⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠋⠉⠀⠀⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠁⠈⠉⠓⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠛⠛

        Squidward

          ─────▄████████████▄──── ───▄▄█░░░░░░░░░░░░█▄─── ───█░░░░█████████░░█▄── ─██░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░██─ ██░░█████████████░░░░██ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░░█ █░░░████░█████░░░░░░░░█ █░░████████████░░░░░░░█ █░░█─██─█─██──██░░░░░░█ ▀▄░█─▀▀─█─▀▀──█░░░░░▄█▀ ─▀██▄▄▄▄█▄────█░░▄▄█▀── ─▄█░░░░░░█▄▄▄▄▀░░█───── ▄█░░░░░░█▀░░░░░░░▀▀█▄── █░░░░░░█▌░▄██████▄░░█── █░░░░░░░███████████░█── █░░░░░░░██░░█░░░██░░█── ▀█░░░░░██░░░░░░██░░█─── ─▀▀▀▀▀█░████████░░█──── ──────▀▄░░░░░░░░░█─────

          Handsome Squidward

            ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⠖⠊⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠲⢤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡤⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠈⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡆⡜⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⡂⠀⠇⠱⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢄⡀⢠⣟⢭⣥⣤⠽⡆⠀⡶⣊⣉⣲⣤⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠐⠂⠘⠄⣈⣙⡡⡴⠀⠀⠙⣄⠙⣛⠜⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠛⠀⠀⠀⢸⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠓⠦⢄⣘⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇⡀⠀⠀⣠⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠁⠈⡟⠒⠲⣄⠀⠀⡰⠇⠖⢄⠀⠀⡹⡇⢀⠎⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠹⠀⡞⠀⠀⢀⠤⣍⠭⡀⢱⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣠⠞⠀⠀⢠⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⢴⠥⠤⠦⠦⡼⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠋⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⣠⢤⠐⠁⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠬⠥⣄⠀⠀⠈⠲⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢳⠀⠀⢀⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠒⠦⠤⢤⣄⣀⣠⠤⢿⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡼⠁⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀

            Squidward with boobs

              ⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⠀ ⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⡶⠶⠶⠶⠶⣶⣭⣽⣿⣿⣷⣆ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⢿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠉⠁⠈⠉⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⡿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⢴⣐⢦⠀⠀⠀⣴⡖⣦⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⡔⣻⣭⡇⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡇⠦⣬⣟⢓⡄⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⠿⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⢼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⣷⣭⣭⣭⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀ ⠀⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⢻⣿⣿⡄⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣮⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢹⣿⣿⣿⡟⢛⢻⣷⢻⣿⣧⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡏⣿⡟⡛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣼⣿⢸⣿⣿⠀