Masturbation is a sport
Masturbation is a sport.
According to Oxford Dictionary, a sport is defined as “an activity involving physical exertion and skill in which an individual or team competes against another or others for entertainment."
Masturbation:
• involves physical exertion
• involves skill
• is entertaining
• involves individuals and groups that can compete against each other
Therefore, using this criteria, beating your meat is objectively a sport.